Municipal Stadium After the Suns?

Artist's rendering of "Lake Hagerstown"

HAGERSTOWN, MD - With the mayor and council expressing no interest in keeping the Suns in Hagerstown, many local residents are wondering what will happen to Municipal Stadium after the Suns are gone.

A proposal which is gaining traction is to turn Municipal Stadium into a floating hotel resort, in order to attract tourists.

"Hagerstown can become the ultimate vacation spot!" said a city official.

One of the issues which has plagued Municipal Stadium for years is its ability to retain water. After a heavy rain, many Suns games have been postponed due to a flooded field.

"Let's take advantage of the stadium's ability to retain water, and turn it into a man-made lake. Once the lake is built, we bring in a cruise ship and float it on top. Think of the possibilities! Don't like the ocean? No problem, come get the cruise ship experience at Hagerstown instead!" exclaimed the project manager.

The plan involves sealing existing walls and reinforcing them to hold in water.

"We've spent all these years trying to keep water out of Municipal Stadium. Why didn't we think of this years ago?" said one local resident when he learned of the plan.

Additional ideas include using the man-made lake for ice skating during winter months, and possibly even building a boat ramp to allow fishing.

"We'll need to talk with the Department of Natural Resources to find out if we can stock the lake with trout," according to the project manager.

No pineapples under the sea were harmed while writing this article. The Hagerstown Report is a satire website.