In today's defense, it was claimed that local elected officials can be easily influenced by topics on TV shows. Hopefully, none of our officials watch The Hunger Games (or maybe we'd be better off?) While this newest spin on the Chewbacca defense did not work, it sets new ground for further usage of this strategy. Imagine when bank robbers can simply claim they were trying to raise money for a single mom they saw on the show, or similar circumstances!
To further expand on this concept, perhaps there should be shows which are required viewing for our elected officials. We at The Hagerstown Report have taken the liberty of writing a list of possible shows for other elected officials here in Washington County, in order to help them become better public servants.
- Washington County Sheriff - The X-Files. What better show to help our top law enforcement officer solve crimes than two of the greatest investigators of all time, Mulder and Scully?
- Mayor of Hagerstown - Independence Day. When your
citycountry is in ruin, what better movie to inspire a strong leader than a movie about fighting till your last breath to keep your citycountry out of the hands of illegalalien invaders?
- Board of Education - American Pie. There's not better way to get in touch with your students and understand them than this coming-of-age movie. After all, who doesn't enjoy a warm apple pie?
- State Representative/Senate - The Empire Strikes Back. Because even if you win small victories like blowing up the Death Star, in the end the Democratic Empire is going to cut off your hand.
- Congressional Representative - We didn't bother picking a movie for this one, because let's face it, our district is so gerrymandered that John Delaney can keep the seat for as long as he wants.
No pies were ruined by elected officials while writing this article, and we'll just tell their mothers we ate it all. The Hagerstown Report is satire.