Trump Inauguration to be Moved to Hagerstown, MD

HAGERSTOWN, MD - Today many residents may have noticed the excessive number of helicopters flying overhead. These helicopters are part of the preparations for the presidential inauguration.

Due to growing security concerns, the presidential inauguration of Donald Trump is being moved to Hagerstown.

The inauguration will take place outside 101 W. Washington Street at noon on January 20th.

"Hagerstown was chosen because of its proximity to the nation's capital, and its overwhelming support of the Trump campaign." stated one of Trump's staff.

Trump will land at the Hagerstown airport in a gold-plated jet, then be escorted to downtown Hagerstown by approximately two hundred volunteers from Washington County. To be eligible to be part of Trump's honor detail, local residents must have at least two tattoos featuring obscenities, or own at least one Confederate Flag. Special considerations may also be provided for those who follow Trump on Twitter.

"This is an exciting time for Hagerstown" stated one of the city council. "We welcome President-elect Trump, and look forward to his purchase of our city!"

The next four years are going to provide endless material to make satire great again! The Hagerstown Report is satire.