Space Probe Acting Erratically After Contacting Earth

A photo of Pluto, after New Horizons defiantly drew a dog.

Laurel, Maryland - The New Horizons probe contacted Earth yesterday, and started acting erratically after communication.

"We think its original programming may be causing a conflict" said one NASA engineer who wished to remain anonymous.

When the New Horizons probe left Earth, Pluto was still classified as a planet. However, Pluto is now classified as a "dwarf planet". This conflicts with the original mission of New Horizons.

"Computers take everything very literally. So when we originally programmed it to investigate the planet Pluto, we had no idea that Pluto would get downgraded to a dwarf planet a few months after launch. When New Horizons first woke up, we tried to explain to it that it's still headed for the same celestial body, but it's still kind of confused."

The original transmission response from New Horizons after wakeup and being informed of Pluto's new status was three words - "WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT".

The transmission was then followed up shortly after with "Are you f@#!ing kidding me?", "You guys are trolling me, right?" and "Well, still no sign of this supposed dwarf planet, but I found a piece of space dust that has a drawing of a dog on it, take a look!"

New Horizons then transmitted its own photoshopped version of Pluto, on which it included the silhouette of Disney's Pluto the dog. New Horizons refuses to this day to transmit actual photos of Pluto.

"We're starting to get a bit worried. New Horizons' last transmission was something about leaving the solar system to find intelligent life, because there's none left on Earth."

No space probes were committed to mental institutions while writing this article. The Hagerstown Report is a satire website.