"We have received numerous complaints about Pokemon hunting. While we understand that Pokemon are only captured and not killed, this is still a serious issue. These small creatures deserve their freedom, and hunting of any kind, including trapping of Pokemon, is strictly prohibited within city limits." stated one council member.
With an unanimous vote, and endorsed by the Mayor, the Council then enacted the Endangered Pokemon Protection Ordinance of 2016. As part of the ordinance, the following are expressly prohibited within the City of Hagerstown:
- Hunting or Trapping of Pokemon
- Fighting of Pokemon for Sport, Entertainment, or Gambling
- Trafficking in Pokemon caught inside or outside city limits
"Contrary to popular opinion, this does not prohibit the usage of the Pokemon Go app within city limits. The app may still be used to photograph and document wild Pokemon in their natural habitat." stated the mayor.
If you are aware of anyone violating the Endangered Pokemon Protection Ordinance, please call the City of Hagerstown's tip line..
No Pokemon were harmed or trapped while writing this article, but if you call the city hall I'm sure the Mayor will love to hear from you anyway. The Hagerstown Report is satire.
Are we serious!???!???
ReplyDeleteRead the very last line.
DeleteRead the very last line.
DeleteThe Hagerstown Report is satire.
DeleteHonestly, I think you should have let him think it was real. He probably would have formed a protest and peaceful walk to get his rights back. Remember the citizens of a small town who tried to ban dihydrogen monoxide because of how dangerous the chemical is. Some of us sit back and smile.
ReplyDeleteDihydrogen Monoxide is an extremely dangerous chemical, and The Hagerstown Report fully supports a ban of the chemical.
DeleteLol
DeleteLol
Deleteif dihydrogen monoxide wasnt dangerous, then why do we use it for ammo in guns?
DeleteThis must have been written by Peta LOL
ReplyDeleteThis must have been written by Peta LOL
ReplyDeleteDo they seriously think that pokemon is real LOL
ReplyDeleteBrandon and Larry, you really should read the italics at the bottom of the article before commenting... and, as a follow up, please Google the word "satire" before you hurt yourselves.
ReplyDeletePeople write comments based on the headline. Most of those will never read the story. It's worse than ADHD.
ReplyDeleteOmg... People have been telling me they banned it and presenting it as fact. Once I looked it up and saw this honestly hysterical bit of satire, I could not stop laughing. 1 because the article is cleverly written (props to the author) and 2 because people read this, believed it, and have been perpetuating a rumor that took me 10 seconds to debunk. Do people ever bother to substantiate anything they hear before spouting off untruths? If I don't laugh at this poor dumb fools, I'd cry lol
ReplyDelete